She walks around in clothes that comfort her. Style to her means nothing. Comfort trumps everything else. No pretenses. When she talks, you know she means business.

Of course you know she is the most successful woman or man around. She does not have to scream that aloud. Her persona speaks for itself. Respect is something she instinctively commands. You want to respect her because you know she is a cut above the rest. And yet it all comes at a price, a price she has chosen to pay. The cost is that of her ‘personal life’. Work fulfills her but does she want more? I would never know. But do I want more? Yes.

I diva pic

Since the time I walked out of college and into the professional world I knew I was ambitious. I also I love babies and flowers and all things ‘girly’. What I want to know is if it is possible to have both in life? Can you be an extremely successful woman and still manage to have a loving family? A happy marriage, kids and all that jazz? Or does success in one sphere mean that you have to pay a heavy cost in the other?

I find myself asking these questions because the more I look around the more I see successful woman who are single or divorced. Why can a woman not have the best of both the worlds? Or do they have it and I have not seen enough of the ones who have it. Why do all the successful men have beautiful wives and not the other way around? Am I judging too much? Yes. However these are questions to which I find myself seeking answers to.

Since the time I entered the world of media I noticed that most of the new recruits were women and yet most of the seniors I reported to were men. Where did all the women go? If they joined in such large numbers how did so little of them survive?

I know the answer is a combination of extremely demanding hours and the call of domesticity. Then again the hours were as much demanding for the men, but they have gone on to occupy higher designations. Except the few women who turned out to be the exceptions.

And then I find myself wanting to know if I want to be that exception. All I know is that I am ambitious. I also know I do not want to be a man to be successful. All things ‘girly’ are what I like and my ambition seeks to go hand in hand with my femininity. Comfort above all else is not me. Pink nail polish? Oh yes, that’s me. Will I find a place somewhere then? When I read this few years down the line I hope I have.